pagereturner | [Reverie] [IC Inbox]

Quick: 1863.
Were there any parts when the Kim Dokja there did anything that says he's fine with being killed?

[damn it all, he should know this but he's still not completely familiar with the story.]

I'm pretty sure not? Putting self and worldline at risk is different from being "fine" with it.
Also, before you ask, it's because Han Suyeong is reacting like she remembers all the other times that guy's died and is applying to me.

[Kim Dokja is typing...]

Actually, typing it all out is weird.
Nevermind.
Though this is why loaning books out when I'm still getting familiar with the story is a pain!

[this is all very rapid-fire, ftr]

I see.
She's as perceptive as usual.

That's not the point.
Also, I have never died, thanks.

Let's put aside for one moment whether or not I believe that.
Kim Dokja's lack of regard for his own life is so profound and deeply ingrained, that it can only be such a core trait as to be consistent across all worldlines.

[This is coming from the REGRESSOR??????]

[THIS WAS CLEARLY A MISTAKE.

but also, omg, he wants to punch Yu Junghyeok? this feeling hasn't happened in a long while?]

I think you're focusing on the wrong thing here.
Shouldn't you be more interested in the fact that Han Suyeong's memoryloss is pretty inconsistent?

[Okay, he's gonna stop fucking with him now.]

She remembers things from outside of the 1863rd turn?
...it may be that her memory loss is inconsistent due to her monster. But it may also be that she read the story that the Han Suyeong of the 3rd turn wrote.

[he will have his revenge on this call-out. just you wait.]

It's not the first time she's had a moment like this.
And I don't think it's the second thing.
So it's definitely because of the monster.

You may be right. But don't be so sure.
She may have access to the entire story without setting foot in that library.

[a pause....]

Not a bad theory.
Something to keep in mind.

It's not a theory.
It depends on how her monster is currently affecting her Stigma.

Which in a way confirms that it depends upon her monster anyway.
You said you met it once before.

In a "dream".
And I said "like a library" but it was really more piles of books. Not organized at all.
In a cage-like structure.
With some kind of storm going on outside of it.
There was a moment when the sphinx backed down when a strong wind blew.
So, thinking about it, if it was less a dream and more a mindscape of the part of Han Suyeong where the monster resides...

It sounds like the monster is barely in control of what's happening, if at all.

Like I said, it's not that the monster wants to intentionally hurt Han Sueyong.
I think its influence increases depending on her current state.

Tell me everything from your meeting with it.
Don't spare any details.

I'll finish eating my breakfast and then send something.

[... yes, the timestamp is still decidedly midday.]

No reasonable person could call anything eaten at this time of day breakfast.

They could if it's the meal that breaks their fast.
Also she's getting suspicious about us gossiping and unlike Midday Tryst, there's receipts.
So sit tight and you'll get your story once I'm free.

Edited 2022-02-01 04:54 (UTC)

I don't have all day.

[Yes he does.]

Yes you do.

[and that's the last message from Kim Dokja for the next hour or so however long this thread with Han Suyeong goes on for.

but once he's free, there's a text:]

I still maintain that coming to in a place full of a Constellation's story with letters scattered everywhere was a bit like walking in on a murder scene.

You took too long, you bastard.
Is this your way of defending yourself because you're about to tell how you shot your mouth off and made things worse?

I don't want to hear that from the guy who says he'll kill his monster without knowing how that'd effect himself.
I made a mistake, and I even apologized for it at the end.
Hell, I even took the punishment for it?
Though one interesting thing was that when I was testing reactions to things like blood getting on the books, the sphinx didn't really do much and instead treated me like I was stupid because the books aren't real.
Which I know. They're just mental constructions of concepts, really.

Tell me everything that happened, from the top.

[le sigh, but writing out an account of the dream... though, he's deliberately leaving out any mention of rejection because. that was stupid. and also. he did not reject anyone. MISTLETOE WAS JUST STUPID.]

[damn bro you got your ass kicked.]

The monster believes it's protecting her.
It was ready to kill you because of that.

[listen, some of us don't have stat buffs.]

Right.
Not that that's really a surprise.

[It's Normal That People Want To Kill Him? He's Responsible For Everything, Obviously.]

Day 23, midday-ish

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